Perspective

I tend to never look at the ordinary without thinking of someway that it could be outstanding.....I see that there is no box and an infinite amount of opportunity. I'm not happy because I refuse to accept reality. I'm happy because I see reality as whatever you want to make it. It's like seeing the glass as half empty or half full, who cares! There isn't even a glass there....yeah think of it like that! I'm just ready to express everything that is burning inside of me. It could all sound like a big pot of unintelligence when it comes out, but it's my pot and I will love it! The biggest thing that I have learned is that every great thing that has happened in this world started as a simple idea. It would eventually expand into something marvelous like a caterpillar turning into a butterfly. I think ideas are wonderful and not to be tampered with. People tend to mistake brilliance for insanity...(I'm not saying I'm brilliant, just follow along). I believe these brilliant people refused to have their ideas tampered with. They knew what they have imagined had potential and no self righteous person was going to make a mess of it. It's a sensitive issue; this trying to make the world a better place, when most have lost hope....why? There could be a lot a reasons and I'm not to judge their choices, but I can try to change their outlook from negative to positive.....that will be my first step.

I'm happy...watch me shine!

LONG FREAKIN TIME SINCE I'VE WRITTEN ONE OF THESE BABIES!!!!!!!!
Summer, oh how I love you, but would a little bit of excitement kill ya? I shouldn't be complaining because now I have the money I need to buy ridiculous things on the internet. I am loving this summer despite the fact that I haven't been this boring since I was conceived! I'm actually learning a lot about Polly and how she functions and how sometimes I wish she wouldn't function...(she has teeth like a damn beaver !!!)I currently have 5 bite mark bruises on my arms from her and the thing is is that she does it when she's mad and when she's happy. I can't win. I've been reading about feng shui and I am focusing on finding my center and I've been super happy lately. No, I'm not going to become a Buddhist. I think God would not be happy with me. But, I've really been working on my spirituality as of late. It's like how I see God and how He works in my life. It's a super deep super personal thing for me. I mean it's not like I wouldn't share about it, but it's kinda like my own life line to Him. I think we all have it and it can be found in all different sorts of ways. It's already been decided that when I graduate I'm joining the Peace Corps. I have talked it over with Ma and Dad and they don't really understand, but will support me on my path to change the world. I just need a foot in the door. Just a little opening and I'm going to take up all the space in the room...it's just my nature :) I'm trying to find my focus on what I would like to change. There are so many problems and some are super close to my heart like the abuse of animals, destruction of nature, or the hunger of children. They all fall under different categories, but maybe I could start something in all of them. The main one that has been a fight since the beginning of time is the effort for peace. I've been doing researches on proprietors for peace and they all seem to have one common theme...world peace.....well the world is a big place...Places like Russia don't even know the meaning of the word. I think that I need to start small.... say things like West Virginia peace....then North East peace..the U.S. peace...and so on and so forth. Start small and build up to the ultimate goal. I just have so many ideas and I've started writing them all down. Unlike like past ideas where I try to remember them...it doesn't really work. I even have a few notes scribbled on the back of my Barnes and Noble receipt. I've just been so inspired by life right now that I can't believe that I haven't tried to take some kind of action. My vision will have it's moment in the sun in due time, I do believe......Off to a new subject (sorta) I witnessed one of the most beautiful things in my life. I was taking a walk one day and making a mental image of everything around me and as I was walking I looked down and saw what I thought to be just a pile of bright green leaves. I started to walk over it, but just as I approached it it took off....about a hundred small green butterflies flew up and circled my body. It was almost like a dream. They eventually flew away, but I just stood there while I was being surrounded by these butterflies. It almost felt like Heaven to me. I know I'm sounding a little granola right now, but that's how I find my peace. The simple little things like the beauty of nature are what inspire me to do great things.I'm ready to go back to school, but that means back to reality. I can dig it...bring on life!!!

Sometimes the Bible has to tell me so

I'm done with the crap...tomorrow is Monday and it is going to be a beautiful day damnit. I'm a very easy going person, but I am also very dramatic and I have more paranoia than I know what to do with. Frankly, I'm sick of myself right now. I'm a pissy pants girl with a broken sixth sense that always says...yeah they're upset with you...yeah it sounds like that. I never wonder if someones mad at me there is a voice talking to me in a third person saying well of course they're upset with you, you have to have done something. I tell ya, I aint right in the mind. I tried this thing of trying to be like okay if you don't give me respect then I'm not giving you mine...hell that aint right...plus that aint me. I'm not some Hitler....I stand out in a crowd because of how I am. I'm not going to stand out because I walk around thinking I'm a bad ass.. I really don't and I can't pretend that I do. My name is Hannah Dixon and I have rough edges and I have faults, but I do care when I hurt people. I do care about people in general especially my friends that have become like my family. I'm still young in A LOT of ways, but I'm also finding out that I'm not as young as I think I am. I've had a lot of expierences in my life that sholdn't have happened, but they did and I'm actually thankful for them. They are shaping me into a person who I can say that someday I might actually like. I still have so much to figure out about myself. I'm in a battle right now with myself about why am I like I am. I don't understand, but maybe I'm not supposed to right now and I am willing to accept that. I'm pretty sure I know who I am it's the fact of accepting it and living with it. Ya'll know that I've never been one for not thinking into things, so at this point in my life. I'm a dreamer, a lover, totally capable of anything, witty, and young.

Thats all I have to say about that

This weekend I visited my BFF Heather and tiny baybay. I got awesome clothing from wal mart....I'm not going to deny that I love the Miley Cyrus clothing line. I got some blood work done and found out I'm anemic. I lack iron so now I have Flintstone vitamins WITH iron! I'm soooo excited to have Alissa as my little....I don't really know what to do, but hell I won't ever be bored. I went home and ate super bad, but it's okay because I've lost weight in this last week so I'm doing okay. I don't like veggies all that much so I bought tomato juice to drink....we'll see how that goes. This musical needs to be over and the sun needs to start shining like NOW! I want to run and swim!

hoppin' on the health train

I'm gonna blog about my health
I like fried foods so I am doing away with all of it....I had the cave and I ate some fries today for lunch (SUCK) then tonight I had a pop tart and some Ramon noodles (SUCK SUCK).....Today has been my worst day so far, but I am going to get better. I've taken to running in my room. I turn on some hulu and run in place in front of it. Let me tell you, it really works.....when I'm done I'm worn out and the first day I did it my calves hurt so bad afterwards that I could barely walk. After this musical is over I am going to be hardcore about fitness. I love running and I love working up a sweat. I feel like I'm getting something accomplished when I'm out of breath and bright red lol. I lack motivation for anything at this point in time.....fuck it all!

Sonny and Polly

They are plotting against me I swear it! Polly shit everywhere so I threw her in the shower. I stuck her dirty clothes in a bag and put them in the hallway. I was sitting in the bathroom with her....I hear a crash so I come out to find that Sonny had drug Polly's shitty pants all through the house. So I had to scrub the floor and forget about the tash can that he had just dumped over. As soon as I got done with that I hear a crash in the bathroom. Polly had tried to get out of the shower but before that in the time it took me to scrub the floor she had shit in the shower! UGH! So while I was clening that up I was trying to get Polly dressed as well so I could just get her out of the bathroom. I sent her out of the bathrrom while I tried to clean the damn tub. I get done with that and come out and she is playing the in the garbage that the dog had torn out! Once I got all that cleaned up and her hands washed and what not I sat down in the livingroom and she came to get me and Sonny wanted to sit with me and I shut that down real quick but I'm better now and Polly is on my lap

Cabin Fever

I have been stuck in this house for a long time! As soon as Polly leaves today, I am out the door. I don't know where I'm going. I might just go to my grandma's house, but I have got to get the f out of here. It has been non stop snowing for 3 days 3 DAYS! On my back porch it comes up past my knees almost to the middle of my thighs and that was shoveled a day ago. Now granted we do have rather large snow drifts so thats probably why but still.....forget this snow! My car hasn't moved since it has started snowing and there is about 2 and a half feet in top of it......GAH! This might kill me!